Anything Goes

Reviewed by mojo

I have said this many times in my life, and even though I now write it here so it will always be a small part of the pixillated electronic aether I am certain I will have to repeat myself ad infinitum. And that saying is, "Mojo likes Cole Porter and the Gershwins pretty much equally well, but if you were to tie her down and torture her and threaten her with whiny teenaged pretty-boy 'bands' she will ultimately confess that she thinks the Gershwins' music is a hair more elegant, BUT Cole Porter will always beat them when it comes to the wittiest lyrics".

Man! With a slogan like that, and yet people sometimes accuse poor Mojo of blathering on and introducing aimless digressions instead of just good clean communication! Pfft. But where was I? What was I talking about? Oh, Anything Goes. The song, not the play. Okay, witty wordplay, front and center! Everything--the vocabulary, the syncopation, the rhymes--go ahead, YOU try to tell me this isn't a great song! I will not listen. Usually Mojo is the very cynosure of open-mindedness, but if you're going to be an idiot, rest assured the whole time you are talking I will be nodding and grunting in what you in your idiocy will assume is agreement. But in reality Mojo is just being Polite, because that is the way Mojo Was Raised, for it is Mojo's Favorite Mother's wish that her beloved wee lass Mojo would hopefully and eventually become one of them classy-type broads. So if you were to go on and on about how stupid you think this song is, I'll be composing my shopping list in my head and the "uh-huh" will NOT be agreeing with your ludicrous claims but instead a private admission that I am out of broccoli and I'll need to pick some up or get more from the garden, depending on the season and my contemporaneous growing skills at that moment.

Oh, but Anything Goes. Who can't appreciate the chorus, with all of its prescient listing of all that's wrong with the world. Especially the line "When most guys today that women prize today are just silly gigolos." The wordplay just doesn't get any better than that. (Plus it's as true today as it was back in the Thirties, huh?) It remains a great song in a great musical, one of many of Cole Porter's enduring works still played today.

If you want to see a different version, you can't beat the song's original singer, Ethel Merman. (Yes, Mojo is also an Ethel Merman fan. No, Mojo has not been tested for mental illness. Lately, anyway. Why do you ask?) Hey, Ethel's GREAT! She's not Ella, but she's not without her brassy charms. Nowadays all the sissy wimps on Broadway are miked. They have these little tiny mikes that usually come out of their hair and look like odd little warts on their foreheads. In the publicity shots the mikes are PhotoShopped out, but my girl Ethel don't need no stinkin' mike!

I know, I'm sorry, this site is about Ella. But I like Ethel, too. So there.

Anything Goes (1956)

Click below to hear a sample--or scroll down for associated media: 
Disc Number: 
Cole Porter
Cole Porter

From Wikipedia:


"Anything Goes" is a popular song written by Cole Porter for his musical Anything Goes (1934).

 Notable recordings

   the 1972 Atlantic release "Ella Loves Cole".

 In popular culture

Yi wang si-i wa ye kan dao
Xin li bian yao la jing bao jin tian zhi Dao
Anything goes. [1]